Fridays are special days for me. I don't have to work and I get to pick Eli up from school and basically do whatever I want (unless what I want is to get a massage or to finally get my house clean). Unfortunately though, there are some Fridays that don't turn out as well as I'd like.
On the days that Mark has to coach a basketball game in some far away place, my kids inevitably decide to misbehave. They know I have no relief pitcher to come in and help me cope, so they do their worst. This happened to be the case last Friday.
Eli didn't have school, so I scheduled a list of errands that had been put off for weeks. Of course, on this particular day, it was -17 degrees with the wind chill so carting my kids around seemed rather ludicrous. I didn't let that stop me. I'm a fighter! I bundled them up and let my car warm up for 15 minutes (bye bye, gas!) and off we went.
One of our stops was Barnes and Noble. In hindsight, this may have not been the wisest choice for my kids; one was hyperactive and the other extremely crabby. We attracted the attention of the entire store within seconds of entering. Eli was shouting and trying to haul me to the children's section and Marina was quiet as long as her stroller was moving, but if I happened to pause, she would arch her back and scream. Soon she was so mad it didn't matter if we were moving or not. After 10 torturous minutes, we rushed to pay for our books and then headed over to the Starbucks cafe, where the girl behind the counter told me that they no longer sold the smoothies that I had been bribing Eli with. As his eyes widened, she suggested an alternative: the Strawberries and Cream Frappe. Against my better judgment, I gave in. Eli held the sugar-laden poison like it was gold.
Trying to carry a bag, my coffee, and push a stroller while herding a small child with a milkshake was a snap (on second thought, perhaps I should have elected to pass on my coffee but it just seemed too important at the time). It only took us 5 minutes to get out the door.
It was when we got to the car that the real trouble started. I opened Eli's door for him to get in and by the time I got back over to Marina's side and was hurriedly trying to release her from the stroller, I heard Eli's exclamation. I looked in the car; his face looked horrified. By the side of his seat, his milkshake lie on its side with its entire contents spilling out onto the upholstery. I immediately yelled at Eli (oops) and ran around in circles, not knowing how to remedy the present situation. It was freezing cold. Marina was screaming in her stroller and there was a strawberry disaster attacking my car. I had no napkins or anything useful. I had to improvise. Thankfully, I always carry a stack of mail around with me in the front seat. I found a cardstock flier for a local dentist and used it like a dustpan - my bare hands being the broom. I bailed out the first load while trying to apologize and comfort freezing Marina. I found some old receipts to rub on the mess before I finally gave up. I wiped my sticky, nasty hands on a good pair of black sweatpants and fastened an irate Marina into her seat (if you know me, you know that there are few things I detest more than sticky hands). I wasn't about to give up on the rest of my errands, so we drove around town in a car that smelled like sweet, foul strawberries. I had to apologize to Eli for my overreaction. His poor heart was broken over the loss of a milkshake that he had only taken three sips of.
After we got home, I tried to scrub my seat with upholstery cleaner but it was so cold that it just froze on my seat on top of the strawberry dairy mess. So now, every time I get in my car, I'm seized by an aroma that smells suspiciously like strawberry puke (you know my feelings on vomit...).
Needless to say, my special Friday did not go as planned. Since I'm an eternal optimist, I'm already making plans for this Friday. Maybe I'll take the kids to Pier 1 Imports and let them run around...
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